In Which I Practice Vagabondage: Part I

I had such a marvelous weekend, Gentle Reader! In a way, it was designed to be a practice run for European Vagabondage: hours of buses, crashing on someone’s couch, alone in a crowd of strangers, relying on my wits. I did learn a few valuable things from this weekend, and from my viewpoint while doing it, which is precisely what I was hoping for.

I got a lift from Miss P. to the bus, because in the unusual heat we’ve been having, the walk to the bus – about a half hour, under normal circumstances – would have been brutal, laden with luggage. She took me into town, beating the bus I would have been on by at least an hour. Three buses later, I arrived safely in Seattle, if a few hours early. Also, I learned that it is very difficult for me to write while on a bus. A pity, as I’d been counting on those otherwise wasted hours to get some work done.

I wandered some local streets in Aurora, looking for a corner shop or local cafe, some place to put down my bags for a while, use a public restroom, and write. I found no public restroom, but I did find a place to sit for a while: there was a park-like area labeled a “Pedestrian Underpass” connecting three bus lines and six different streets. Page after page flew by, and the people-watching was exquisite – the ninety-year-old man driving a rusting hot-rod with chain-doors and an two-man saw welded to the body; the young lady in vintage teagown, bonnet, and gloves;  two teenagers on their first date.

Teens

When the wait was over, I practically sprinted the two blocks to my Aunt and Uncle Stone’s place. I adore staying with Uncle G. and Auntie T.; they’re such kind people, genuine and generous. They live in a house that’s over one hundred years old; when you find the gate concealed in the hedge, you’re transported to another world. A towering apple tree bedecked with hanging moss; the green house; a bronze, blind Justice stares at you when you enter. The circle of herbs for Absinthe is to the left, amidst more statuary; the still and the smoker are to the right.

The interior is equally intricate: the only modern electronica in evidence is Uncle’s laptop, which powers the music coming out from the antique console radio. The tiki bar can be seen through an archway, from any point in the living room; Aleister Crowley’s portrait passes judgement on you when you sit on the overstuffed chaise longue, or possibly on the various taxidermy pieces hither and yon.

Basement

Such conversation! Such cocktails! Such camaraderie! The Stones are swell. Auntie T. made up a bed for me on the chaise, and with a bowl of homemade absinthe sorbet – made according to a recipe developed for Gustave Eiffel upon completion of his tower – the sun sets on the trip’s first day.

Alarm, arise, ablutions; coffee and cigarettes. Now, staying with Auntie and Uncle, it’s one thing: we have the same vices, for the most part. I had to consider what I’d do staying with strangers, in the morning – I need a little bit of time to caress my coffee, and to inhale the burnt offerings that bring life. I haven’t quite figured that out. I was successful at taking a whore’s bath with the purpose-packed washcloth in their bathroom, then, as I was there for Pride, got myself dolled up. Auntie hasn’t posted the photos yet, but she was very helpful, lending me glitter from her goody bag from Burlycon, a burlesque convention. Let the words “Hot Pink Glitter Lips” speak for themselves. She took many photos, and you just know that I’m going to share them, when they’re up.

Tyler Pretty

I think that I’ll leave you here for today, Gentle Reader, as I’m strolling down the walk in my ridiculous picture-hat and make-up, parasol poised and ready, heading for the bus in the sun. You may expect Part II on Friday.

About Ty DeLyte

Madame DeLyte has suffered a grave disappointment - YET AGAIN - and still believes that freedom, beauty, and truth are what's valuable, rather than vulgar cash. He'd add love to that list - but, well, what can he say about love?
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29 Responses to In Which I Practice Vagabondage: Part I

  1. Pingback: Post the One Hundredth: In Which We See Amanda Palmer’s Tits (NSFW?) | Whimsical Adventures of the Reverend Doctor

  2. ekgo says:

    The Aunt and Uncle’s house sounds like it should be a place for pilgrimages. LIke the end point, I mean. Or the beginning. That would work, too.

    • Tyler J. Yoder says:

      Their house is one of my favourite places. The apartment they used to live in was pretty nifty, too, but the house is *perfect* for them.

      I ought to make a pilgrimage to see them, soon, come to think of it.

      • ekgo says:

        Yes. You should do that. And then you should take pictures of the greenhouse and garden and all the fascinating things. THEN you should blog about it and include the pictures. Because that would make me happy and I have just now decided your aim in life is to make me happy!
        It’s good to have goals, yes?

        • Tyler J. Yoder says:

          I’ll talk to them and see if I can stay sometime soon. Possibly when I take the Haunted Seattle Underground Tour (Over 21 Version and Also It’s At Night). I’m pretty sure that’s the official name. I only mention it to make you happy. Or jealous. One of those.

          Seriously, though, I like making people happy, but it’s hard to find out how good you are at it without directly asking, and I always come off as conceited when I ask someone if I make them happy, and then it turns into a weird emotional spiral.

          • ekgo says:

            Well, I’m out the door, but before I go, I just wanted to let you know that you make me exceedingly happy just by the things you say and do on the internets, even the things that have nothing to do with me! ❤

          • Tyler J. Yoder says:

            Aww! Thank you! Sorry, I was on the road when you left work, so you won’t see this until tomorrow, but you make me happy too.

          • ekgo says:

            It was a wonderful comment to find today.
            And if course I make you happy. I am fucking delightful.

          • Tyler J. Yoder says:

            I once told one of Ex-Husband’s girls that she should be my friend because I’m fucking charming, so we’re pretty well matched, you and I.

          • ekgo says:

            Dude, we totally are!!
            Charming and Delightful.
            When we have a band, that will be our name.

          • Tyler J. Yoder says:

            I will play electric ukulele, and you can sing! We’ll win the hearts of everyone.

          • ekgo says:

            Or deafen the ears.
            Hearts. Ears. Some body part will be unalterably changed because of our fucking ways.
            Wait, I don’t mean…
            That came out wrong.

          • Tyler J. Yoder says:

            I’m confused. I guess I could perform surgery while we’re, uh, performing, but really, I’m not that kind of doctor.

          • ekgo says:

            And I don’t need anymore surgeries.
            SO.
            We’re good.
            We’re good.

          • Tyler J. Yoder says:

            Wait – are you breaking up the band? Does that make Gabe our Yoko Ono?

          • ekgo says:

            …no.
            Not at all. Because I don’t want him to be my Yoko Ono and I don’t want to pose nude with him on our bed for pictures.
            But also, not breaking up the band. There will just be no copulation going on during our acts. They’re not that kind of act! Which is sort of what I was implying above when I mentioned our “fucking ways” but it is not what I meant! NOT WHAT I MEANT!
            And so…the band is back together and we are clean band, a modest band. A fucking CHARMING AND DELIGHTFUL band!

          • Tyler J. Yoder says:

            Hahaha! I think you win. I’m laughing too hard to come up with a witty retort. ❤

          • ekgo says:

            Legal-kids-only Haunted Seattle Underground tour??? I want to do that!! It sounds AWESOME! You have made me both happy AND jealous! Well done!

          • Tyler J. Yoder says:

            Yeah. I friend heard about it and surprised me with tickets. Cocktails are included in the ticket, I believe. I don’t know if the cocktails are haunted, though.

          • ekgo says:

            They’re probably not, but I’m sure they make it easier for you to feel haunted as the evening progresses.
            What an awesome friend!

          • Tyler J. Yoder says:

            She is. People are always surprising me with awesome things.

          • ekgo says:

            It shouldn’t surprise you at all. Fucking charming people always get neat stuff. Because they’re fucking charming.

          • Tyler J. Yoder says:

            I would say more, but I’m planning a post about people’s kindness/awsomeness.

          • ekgo says:

            Because it’s November and we’re all supposed to be all thankful and crap?

          • Tyler J. Yoder says:

            Oh. I guess it would tie into that. I’ve been planning it for a while, how I just Trust to Providence and then people give me vintage silk kimonos and things. But, Thanksgiving works too.

          • ekgo says:

            You could totally tie that all together! It’s like this month was MADE for your post!
            The pilgrims landed, planted fish and corn in the ground together, and then said, “Hold up! You know what we should do? We should totally have a feast and be thankful and share our thankfulness so that someday, in our great, untamed country that will then be totally tamed, one wonderful lone writer can use the theme of thankfulness, the one we just provided, to write a blog post about putting his wishes out to the universe and receiving great bounty, bounty like this feast which we are about to consume!”
            And that is how Thanksgiving was born. It is for you. And your blog post. So you owe it to the pilgrims to get it out there this month.

          • Tyler J. Yoder says:

            I’m not arrogant enough to think everything is entirely about me. It’s only *mostly* about me.

          • ekgo says:

            Oh.
            I’m totally full-up on myself and assume it really IS all about me. All the time. Even thousands of years ago. Everything up til now has happened for my benefit.
            Which sort of makes things like genocide my fault. That’s not so great, actually.

          • Tyler J. Yoder says:

            Stop endorsing genocide, darling – it’s not polite. You really *do* need that etiquette guide, don’t you?

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