Quitting Smoking

It seems, Gentle Reader, that Music Monday was a bit of a bust. I thought it might be, but that’s never stopped me from trying new things. Unless you all start clamoring for more terrible ukulele videos, we’re going back to ordinary posts on Mondays.

Except that I have nothing prepared for today, and not even a glimmer of an idea of what to share with you. Why is that? I mean, I’ve pulled the last-minute routine successfully from time to time – why should today be any different?

Because I’m quitting fucking smoking and I want to punch everything until there’s no more punches to give.

Today is day two of the attempt. It wasn’t my idea, naturally. Maman is convinced that if she hasn’t quit smoking by the time she has her hip surgery, then she’ll die on the table. She’s convinced that it’s going to kill her for a variety of reasons, most of which can be boiled down to the fact that she’s the same age that my dad was when he died, and that therefore it’s destiny.

Angry Ghost

I’m quitting in solidarity, even though I think she’s being silly, and also because I certainly won’t be able to afford it while I’m tromping around Europe. I plan to switch to one of those vapor things, that look like sonic screwdrivers and give one enough nicotine to keep one from scratching one’s own eyes out, but I haven’t had a chance yet. They’re a little expensive to set up.

While I would like to have a longer post about some charming jaunt or other, I’m going to go dropkick a bear or something to release some of this aggression. Cheers, kittens.

UPDATE: I am no longer on the verge of tearing out someone’s trachea with my teeth, Gentle Reader, because I got a vaporizer this after noon. Via a magical process that I don’t understand, it delivers nicotine in a fog of water vapor and candy-flavored syrup, and has calmed me the fuck down. I haven’t wanted a cigarette since I got it. Yo.

About Ty DeLyte

Madame DeLyte has suffered a grave disappointment - YET AGAIN - and still believes that freedom, beauty, and truth are what's valuable, rather than vulgar cash. He'd add love to that list - but, well, what can he say about love?
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16 Responses to Quitting Smoking

  1. Dar Hamill (The Happiness Post) says:

    Best of luck. Quitting is hard – I’ve tried and failed many times. Also I’d like more music videos. I will record more with you…solidarity!

    • Tyler J. Yoder says:

      Yeah. I’ve been wanting to claw my skin off, which hasn’t happened for a while.

      I don’t know if I’ll keep posting them here, but I’ll definitely make some more. Keep an eye on YouTube!

  2. Pony says:

    I just commented on a friend’s facebook post regarding their quitting- I’m lazy, so here’s a cut and paste: As someone who has chronic lung disease from too many years of smoking, I’d love to see you at least switch to an e-cig. Not the shitty cheapo ones they sell at mini-marts, but a real one. I’d hate to see you wind up like me.

    E-cigs have gotten much less expensive over the past couple of years. I’d be happy to help you choose one when the time is right for you.

    • Tyler J. Yoder says:

      Actually, I picked up a vaporizer today. I remember the conversation we had that day, and I’ve been thinking about it a lot, lately.

    • Dar Hamill (The Happiness Post) says:

      What ‘real’ E-cig would you recommend? I should quit eventually…need some help or the final push or something! Dear god it’s hard!

      • Pony says:

        The best way to go is to visit a vape shop, where you can try different rigs and juice flavors. That said- my setup is a Joyetech eGo T battery with a tube tank. The Vaporium in Lakewood or Fife is a great place to go shopping for all things vape-related.

  3. Tabitha says:

    Congratulations love! Maybe this will help me to quit smoking with you. I have an ecig i love. Having another person at the house who is a non smoker will certainly help a lot. *hug*

  4. Andrea says:

    I’m so happy you got a healthier option for yourself. 🙂

  5. What flavors have you gotten?

    • Tyler J. Yoder says:

      So far, at the shop boy’s recommendation, something called “grapple” – which, in this case, is guava-raspberry-apple. It’s not bad, but I’m looking at toffee-based flavors in future.

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